Thursday, May 02, 2013

Beauty Rituals

My beautician has implemented a frequent treatment card system - a bit like the coffee card used at the cafe across the road from my work. That card is awesome - I get at least two free coffees a week (and I only work at that place on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays).  I actually buy more coffee from my local cafe, but they don't have a coffee card system - they're far too posh for that.  Either that or they know that I'd be back every second day to collect my freebie.

Anyway, the deal with my beautician's frequent treatment card is that after five visits you get a free eyelash tint and when you get to ten visits, you get $25 off a facial.  I presume you then go back to the beginning and start again... I haven't been going there long enough to know.  I'm sure I'll find out eventually - I am in there every four weeks for hot wax torture.

But today marked my 6th visit since I realised this scheme existed and so (because we forgot last visit), I got my free eyelash tint.

I can hear those of you who know me and therefore know my colouring, snorting from here.

My heritage is a mixture of Scots, English, German and Spanish. In terms of colouring, I definitely drew from the Spanish side of the family.  My hair is quite a dark brown, I have ridiculously dark eyebrows and I have very long and very dark eyelashes.

I'm not really the target market for an eyelash tint and I did question the point of having one, but my beautician insisted it would really enhance my eyes. "Make them pop" was the actual expression she used, which made me think of the odd occasion my Granddad would pop his glass eye out to freak us when we were kids.  Not pleasant.  But I went ahead with it anyway.  It was free. What did I care?

Well, other than there being the slightest amount of residue around my eyelashes, which makes it look like I'm wearing eyeliner, I can't flippin' tell the difference.

So imagine my expression when, as my beautician is rebooking me for my next waxing appointment, she perkily asks if I want to book in for another eyelash tint?  She wasn't actually looking at my face as she asked it, so I had a few seconds to school my features into something resembling neutrality.  Thankfully.

Because if she'd looked at me as she was asking me, she would've seen this expression:

But by the small mercy of her starting at her computer screen as she was asking the question, she got this expression:

Another eyelash tint.  REALLY?  REALLY???

Nice try lady, but this isn't Maccas and I'm not upsizing to the combo.

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