You're Outta Here

Much as it pains me to write this post...



You set yourself up for it honey. Dixie Chicks are cool (especially because of their anti-George Bush stance). Dolly is a legend.

But Shania??

Even though I still voted for you, because you're a top bird and one of the rare auditionees at the Seymour Centre that week, who actually bothered to talk to us (and apologise if you were disturbing our work day), you shot yourself in the foot by singing Shania Twain.

Kenny Rogers would have been preferable to Shania. Hell, even singing a Keith Urban number might have scored you more votes.

I'm really sorry to see you go and I hope you continue performing. Release an album of Dixie & Dolly and I'll buy it for sure. Just don't put Shania on there. She's painful to the ear.

Before I go however, I must say one thing. OK, three things.

1. It astonishes me that Sideshow Bobby dodged a bullet this week. He should've at least been in the bottom 3. Bad song choice, bad performance. So he's missing his family. Well cry me a freakin' river Bob. You're there to perform. So perform.

2. Mutto. Yes he was sick, but if you're sick you work with what you can do and try not to go for the high notes. He must leave. Soon.

3. CAN WE PLEASE JUST GET RID OF LISA-THE-ONE-TRICK-PONY???


That is all.

x

Snaps for elaine!

Alright, I admit it. I had to coerce my way into getting tagged for this one.

Well, not really. I just begged elaine to tag me and she did. What a wonderful pirate she is.

1. Three things that scare me
- John Howard and George Bush. I consider them one and the same.
- Not succeeding (I really mean FAILURE, but I'm trying to put a positive spin on it here people. Work with me.)
- Intimacy

2. Three things that make me laugh
- Da Budda. She really is the devil incarnate. I wish I'd been that bolshi at the age of 5.
- David Tennant as Dr Who. I never knew Dr Who was that funny or witty (or sexy).
- My friends.

3. Three things I hate the most
- John Howard and George Bush and what they and their minions are doing to the world.
- Boys who wear their collars turned up. Its a seriously bad fashion statement lads - STOP. IT.
- Stupid people.

4. Three things I don't understand
- I have to reiterate elaine's first one... Why people keep voting in the Libs. They're EVIL.
- Mark Holden.
- Quantum physics. And compound fractions.

5. Three things I'm doing right now
- Well, um, this meme of course.
- Looking at the clock and realising that I should get to bed as I have to work at 9am tomorrow.
- Downloading bad songs from iTunes (damn that Ricky Muscat for singing Peter Cetera on Australian Idol tonight! I have a hankering for that song from the Karate Kid).

6. Three things I want to do before I die
- Have a book published.
- Co-star in a film with Luke Wilson.
- Breed (OH. MY. GOD. Did I just say that???). Of course combining two and three would be top of the list.

7. Three things I can do
- Cook an awesome roast.
- Type really fast.
- Sing pretty much any TV theme from the 80s.

8. Three ways to describe my personality
- Complete.
- (yet vaguely) Amusing.
- Nutter.

9. Three things I can't do
- Sew. I really suck at it. Even at the simple stuff like sewing on buttons.
- Maintain a relationship.
- Backbends in yoga.

10. Three things I think you should listen to
- Gut instinct. Something I don't listen to often enough.
- Mötley Crüe and KISS. Mandatory for everyone's iPod.
- Your Grandmother. You never know what gossip you might find out.

11. Three things you should never listen to
- Your censor. Read The Artist's Way and you'll understand.
- Sales assistants. Especially those who convince you that forking out $80 for foundation will make you look like a goddess.
- Members and supporters of the Liberal Party. I really, really had to reiterate that one elaine.

12. Three things I'd like to learn
- How to save money
- How to maintain an exercise regime
- How to poach eggs

13. Three favourite foods
- Cheese
- Chocolate
- Chicken, chips & gravy from Clem's Chicken Shop on King Street.

14. Three beverages I drink regularly
- Cordial (preferably Cottees Orange & Mango Light)
- Red Wine
- Coffee

15. Three shows I watched as a kid
- The Famous Five. I soooo wanted to be George.
- Happy Days. I only wanted to be Joanie when she was snogging Chachi. Oh and when she got to be backup singer for Leather Tuscadero.
- Magilla Gorilla. No one ever could tell me (or Ogee for that matter) how much that gorilla in the window actually cost.

16. Three people I'm tagging
- Whomever
- Cares
- To

I can only hope this really is how it will end...

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Yes Bevis, I hear you.

Just so you don't have to look at the Vote for Klancie post anymore... a quick catch up.

Boring, but since I'm rehearsing one play during the day and performing in another at night, my head is full of nothing but lines, lines, bloody lines (and blocking) so there's precious little room for anything else.

So... to catch y'all up on what I've been doing, here you go:

Fortnightly trips to the eye hospital. Its getting better, but far too slowly for my liking. Still no contact lens wearing allowed (not even for an hour on stage each night I was told on Friday!) and I still have to put those bloody drops in every two hours.

Boring.

Our play opened two weeks ago. We got a very average review from one Mr S Dunne of the SMH, but then we knew this play wouldn't be his cup of tea... especially because he wanted to read the script before he came. Who does that?

HOWEVER, Jason Blake, also of the SMH gave us a very good review and there were two or three other reviews which were brilliant so we're a pretty happy little bunch.

EXCEPT...

Our houses have been shit. Five people on Wednesday, seven on Saturday... what's wrong with people? Its great theatre. Three out of four brilliant reviews say so. We give you free wine and beer before the show. The show only goes for an hour so you can still go out and party afterwards. Come on people. Support independent theatre!

Anyway.

I broke my toe in one of the opening scenes on Thursday. That was fun. I did almost the whole show (barefoot) trying not to put any weight on my left foot. Bit difficult when you have to jump around on boxes and so forth.

Ah well.

What else???

Klancie's still hanging in there. I like to think my votes are counting. Reigan is gone - THANK WHOMEVER! Lisa should be the next to go. I think she's trying to sound like Bjork. And heaven knows we don't need another Bjork in the world. At least she's not trying to look like her.

Ummmmm....

Another mate has just announced she's breeding. And another has just popped out her second. I really wish my friends would quit bloody breeding. Its very expensive.

Da Buddha turned 5 yesterday. She really is a wicked creature. She's taken to locking people out of the house. LOVE. IT. ENCOURAGE. IT.

I have a new flatmate. She brought a piano with her. Its most exciting. Or at least it will be when I actually have time to start playing it. Its like riding a bicycle right? You never forget? Let's hope so.

I'm still addicted to Dr Who and Grey's Anatomy. They're the only two TV shows I'm getting to watch at present. So many yummy Doctors...

But I must farewell... there is work to be completed and lines to be learned. Or is that learnt? Never quite sure which is which.

I have some days off coming up (what are they?!?!) so expect a little posting action to happen.

In the meantime, hope this has shut you up kept you happy Bevis my friend.

[insert one of those winky things here]

xoxo

Vote Now!!

Awesome. She got a wild card entry. And belted out a great version of "Red Neck Woman" last night.

And screw you Mark Holden... I say bring on a C&W Australian Idol. Its got to be better than that monosybillic Casey Donovan who had no genre, style or personality or Kate D'whatsherface who sings sappy songs for nannas.

Klancie is a top bird and if she doesn't get through tonight I will be seriously pissed off at the teenage voting public.

VOTE FOR KLANCIE!

Oh and well done to the boys... especially my man of the week Mark Williams (8 goals!). 11th place isn't so bad... especially when we finished above Port, Brisbane, the Roos, the Bombers and Carlton. I've got a good feeling about 2007.

100 Shameless Plugs

Its my blog so I can put whatever I want on here.

And today, I'm going to post a shameless plug for my show.

If you're in Sydney, come and check it out. We really need a crowd for next Wednesday's preview as someone from the Sydney Morning Herald is coming to do a review, so if you can be a bum on a seat it will only cost you $15! Normally it will cost you $27. Or $22 if you're one of those concessionary types.

Here endeth the plug.

Normal posting will resume shortly.

Hope you're all well, etc, etc.