Do The Movie Mash

A friend posted this on my facebook wall the other day:

As you may have already gathered, I had mixed feelings about this film.  Loved Aaron Tveit, hated Russell Crowe.  The usual stuff.

So of course this little piece of YouTube genius appealed to me on so many levels.  Kudos to the person(s) who made it.  I'm highly impressed.

What particularly impressed me (and inspired me) was the Forrest Gump reference at 0:37... so much so that I had to hit pause for a good three minutes whilst I snorted with laughter.  I snort with laughter on a fairly regular basis, but this in particular tickled me no end.  And got me thinking... imagine a Les Mis/Forrest Gump mash up! 

Yes, I can hear you groaning.  But just think about it.  The similarities between the two movies are definitely there...

Jean Valjean.  Overcomes adversity to become a successful businessman but harbours guilt and a yearning for something he cannot have.  Becomes involved with a woman who dies, leaving him in charge of (her) child.

Forrest Gump.  Overcomes adversity to become a successful businessman but harbours guilt and a yearning for something he cannot have.  Becomes involved with a woman who dies, leaving him in charge of (their) child.

And don't even get me started on the women... 

Fantine (no surname), who has a terrible history with abusive men, has a child out  of wedlock, turns to prostitution, falls ill and dies, leaving her child in the care of the man who tries to save her.

Jenny (no surname), who has a terrible history with abusive men, has a child out of wedlock, (doesn't necessarily turn to prostitution, but she had to pay for that drug habit somehow, so you do the math...), falls ill and dies, leaving her child in the care of the man who (always) tries to save her.

It's positively spooky how similar they are.

Also, think of the fun scenes you could mash up:

Every time Javert is chasing Valjean, Fantine could be there screaming "Run, Valjean, RUN!". 

When Forrest carries Bubba out of the jungle, he could sing "Bring Him Home" over his half-dead body.

Valjean could turn up somewhere in the south operating his own shrimping boat, with Marius, who lost his legs in the sewers (all those faeces caused infections) swinging from the mast and encourage Valjean to invest in a startup company which would make them millions.

Oh yeah. The possibilities are endless.  I'd TOTALLY watch that movie.

I'm going to go and plot some other movie mash ups now... this could be FUN.


1 May 2013

**** STOP THE PRESS!! ****

Have had a better idea on the shrimp boat concept...

Scrap Marius.  

Javert doesn't actually die (like he wants to) when he jumps off the bridge.  He does however smash his legs to bits so they have to amputate them. He spends years brooding some more and drinking and blaming Valjean for his troubles, but eventually joins Valjean on the shrimp boat, becomes his friend, encourages him to invest in the startup company which makes them millionaires and turns up years later with prosthetic legs and a lovely lady who accepts him just the way he is.

YEAH.  That's more like it. A Javert/Lieutenant Dan combo.

I'm on a roll here, people.

This Is Why I'm Clueless About New Music

I blame digital radio.

Specifically, I blame whoever introduced me (I think it was my friend Kane) to the app I downloaded to my phone, which allows me to listen to radio stations from around the globe at the drop of a hat (and a wifi connection).

Since I discovered this app and all the glorious radio stations available to me (about a year ago), I have barely listened to Triple J or Nova or RRR or any of the other radio stations which could conceivably introduce me to new music.  No.  Instead I listen to Non-Stop 80s Radio or Awesome 80s Radio or (my personal favourite) Movie Ticket Radio (Pop). 

All 80s. ALL THE FREAKING TIME. They play stuff I don't even have in my (extensive) music collection.  Now THAT'S impressive.

As for Movie Ticket Radio (Pop) (there is a Classic version, which I also listen to occasionally).  Well. WELL.  It is what is says.  Music featured in movies.  This covers everything from the awesome Jerry Orbach crooning Be Our Guest from Beauty and the Beast to Shirley Bassey's iconic Goldfinger from the James Bond movie of the same name to The Pixies' classic Where Is My Mind from Fight Club.  It's seriously awesome.

I spend most of my work-from-home time with one of these digital stations playing in the background - in fact Non-Stop 80s Radio is blaring out some classic A-ha number (not Take On Me - the other one they had about sun shining on televisions) as I type.

The only downside about listening to these stations, is that I am now utterly clueless when it comes to current music.  I could no more tell you the title of the latest Daft Punk song than I could hum the tune of anything by Rhianna.

As someone who prides herself on being fairly up with pop culture, I am somewhat embarrassed by this and I apologise profusely to those artists (particularly the local ones) trying to to break into the industry who rely on people like me listening to radio stations playing their music and then jumping onto iTunes to download their album.  

I'M REALLY SORRY AND I WISH YOU ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD, BUT I'VE BECOME ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE.

I'm just not listening to new stuff because the old stuff is just so freaking good.

Soz.

Some Days, There Just Aren't Enough GIFs

So, this morning I went on a little shopping expedition to Chadstone with a mate. I wanted to go to Gap for more boxers (see this post for a refresher) and since said mate has a couple of munchkins, she wanted to check out Gap Kids so I tagged along upstairs once I'd found what I needed.  

We didn't find anything for the munchkins, but our reaction to the discovery that a Gap Kids size XL is the perfect fit for the two of us, was something akin to this:

There was an entire wall of sale items, so I got the cutest sweater in the boys section for the bargain price of $14.25 (which for Gap is practically 90% off) and my mate picked up a polka-dot cardigan for about $25.  

Needless to say, we WILL be returning.  OFTEN.

So then I get home and they're putting up scaffolding around my block of flats in preparation for re-roofing.  Right around the whole building.  The banging of metal was annoying enough but to discover I've lost almost all the natural light in my study made me feel like this: 

Then I checked a few work emails.  One was from a colleague in Sydney and opened with the line "Thank you for offering to assist with...".

I had to physically step away from the keyboard to prevent myself from hitting the reply button and typing: "Just for the record, I NEVER OFFERED TO ASSIST YOU - MY BOSS JUST TOLD ME I HAD TO DO THIS - I WOULD'VE BEEN FIRED IF I'D SAID NO."

Because really, when it comes to adding to my (already quite heavy) workload, I feel mostly like this:

But then, that's mostly got to do with the fact that I don't want to do any aspect of my job right now and I'm getting increasingly desperate to find a new place to work.

So.  

That's a snapshot of my day in GIF form.  How was yours?

It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time...

My life is a series of "It Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time" moments, all randomly strung together.

A bit like this blog.

There's so much I could write about.

So much I want to write about.

A million thoughts running through my head but they're all fleeting.  

I'm really hating my job at the moment and I want to change direction and find something new, but the job market's tough and I can't even get a foot in the door at any of the places I'm interested in working.

Life would be a lot easier if I had a definite plan for what I wanted to do.  

Trouble is, I don't.

I don't have a single clue WHAT I want to do with my life, other than that I DON'T want to do what I'm currently doing.

Is that any way to live my life? I'm really not sure. It's the only way I've known how to live it.  I’ve never been much of a one for ten year plans or goal setting.  I mean, I am ok at setting goals in a “hey, that sounds like a good idea so I’ll go do it” kind of way.  Heading off to travel the world was a prime example of that.  Quitting the corporate world to go to drama school was another.

But now I have to factor in things like being able to pay the rent and bills; and I don't have any savings to speak of, making my current desire to give a big, fat "fuck you" to my job an impossibility.

It's frustrating me no end and I'm really in need of a big ol' cup of "sort it the hell out" before I lose my mind...

Anyone know where I can get one of those?

Champagne Tastes, Beer Budget

I've always found that particular phrase slightly inappropriate in my case, since I dislike beer.  Really dislike it. I've tried it and I just can't stand it. I'm a grape girl through and through.

Anyway, that's not what this particular post is about.  Well it wasn't.  What was it about?  Ummmm... sidetracked. Sorry.  

OH!

My new coat.  I got the loveliest autumn/winter-ish coat last week.  It's a black Gap trench, with cream piping and a black lining with pink, blue, orange, green and white spots on it. It's light enough for autumn, but with a few layers underneath will be great for winter as well.  I've worn it most days since it got it.

I say "got it" and not "bought it", because I bought it online. 

On eBay.  Which is where I've bought a good many of my coats and jackets... and the odd frock.  

Why?

Because I am a girl on a budget.  A girl with designer tastes on a very strict budget.

So this is how I roll.  

One of my colleagues finds it quite horrifying that I buy some of my clothes secondhand. She won't wear anything that's been worn by someone else - says it's unhygienic.  I could see her point if I was purchasing secondhand underwear or shoes, but it's a coat.  I've had it cleaned.  I highly doubt I'm going to be catching any diseases from wearing it.

But if I do, at least I'll have saved money from the purchase to spend on antibiotics...

How Much Is That Puppy In The Window?

I think I want a puppy.

No.  

I'm CERTAIN I want a puppy.  I know some people may say this is related to the ticking of my biological clock, but I don't want a baby.  Babies grow up to be kids.  Kids talk back.  Kids grow up to be adults and don't always turn out the way you think they should. Kids are expensive. Dogs are too, but not so much.  And they're always genuinely glad to see you.  There's no angst with a dog.  

So yes, I want a puppy.

Not just any puppy, but a wee Westie.  

Like this one:

(cue "nawwwwww"-ing)

I love Westies.  They're they only small dog I actually like.  Most small dogs I dislike with the same dislike I reserve for cats.  I loathe cats.  I am totally in agreement with Ron Swanson when it comes to cats and small dogs (see below*).  But Westies I love.  I think it's some Scottish genetic thing. They just melt my heart.

However, I believe that dogs should be rescued, not bought from pet shops or puppy farms.  It breaks my heart that so many dogs are routinely abandoned or abused and that our animal shelters are overflowing with beautiful dogs that just want a home and some TLC. 

So I've vowed that when (note I say "when", not "if") I get a dog, it will be from a shelter, not a pet shop or puppy farm.  

The trouble is, who would abandon a cute-as-a-button Westie puppy?  Not many people.  I doubt many people would even abandon a cute-as-a-button Westie adult:

 (seriously, is it not the cutest puppy face ever?)

The other flaw in my plan is I'm not sure I'm allowed to have a dog in my flat.  One of my neighbours does but I'm not sure my lease allows is.  I'll have to check.  Also, I'm not sure it's fair to a dog to have to live in a flat. I always grew up being told that "dogs need a yard".  Since I don't plan on moving anytime soon, it may not happen.

But in the meantime, I'll keep on thinking about it... and checking the rescue websites (because, let's face it, if I was to actually walk into a shelter, I'd come out with a dozen dogs).

* COSIGN (except in the case of Westies):