Toiley

Help! I am surrounded by tiny fairies.

400 of the little midgets. Well, probably only 250-300 of the little midgets and 100 - 150 of their parents/guardians/poor schleps that work in childcare centres.

Its school holidays and there's a kiddies show about fairies on. Thankfully my company isn't putting the show on so I don't have to interact with any of the stressed out adults & ADHD medicated midgets.

In theory.

The box office where I work is in an old cloakroom, which is smack-bang in the centre of the passage leading to the toilets. All those midgets in their fairy wings have to go past me to use the toilet.

Or "toileys" as I heard one mother just call it.

What happens to people's language skills when they're talking to small children? Why must a 'toilet' become a 'toiley'?

And why must small children attempt to un-nerve me by standing mutely in front of me and staring with their big, round eyes whilst I attempt to do my work?

And since when did four year olds wear nail polish and lipstick? And that's just the boys...
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Someone pass the vodka.